Charlie Riley

So now what? Tomorrow is D-Day, out with the old, in with the new, except that phrase needs to flip flop, as a new decade inches my “oldness” odometer a little higher, with new expectations. The fact that I share the day I enter into a more mature, wiser decade the same afternoon the United States of America enters into a historic, more mature and wiser leadership makes it even more interesting, in an amazing way.

This is a meme I was told several years ago, and have since followed as I navigated through the uncertainty also known as “your mid-twenties.”

So as I approach the pearl anniversary of my time on planet earth, I have come up with a list every person should seek to acquire. Granted, not all of these nuggets of wisdom are things I have mastered, and those that know me might think twice, or three times, about adapting any intelligence I pontificate into their daily life.

So in no order of importance, here are a few things you should seek to have:

-A go-to drink. This could be rotated like a season, but there should always be a fall back when trouble arises. (Like a friend with benefits, when you are not in a relationship, of course). You might forget about them, or be too cool for school with your hot new Mojito or Bud Lime, but they’ll be there for you when you come back, catching up like old times.

-A Charity, Cause, or Passion. Find one that does not benefit you, with the exception of the good feeling you receive for your, time, talent or treasure. Find something that you can get behind, and even if it is a few hours a month, there are thousands of organizations that could use your help, and ideas, but make sure you do it for the right reasons. I have aligned myself with some wonderful organizations, and while it can get tedious attending board meetings, mailing in a check each month or doing menial work, all I need to do is see a kid suffering from cancer smiling or receive a genuine thank you, and that currency is better than the paper kind.

-That one skill only you can master. Well that would be impossible, I doubt you can pul a Jesus and turn some aqua into vino for the hell of it. But there has to be something you can feel some pride about that most others can’t. Some are great with cars, some are good listeners, some people actually understand accounting. I know, crazy right? But it is good to be sought out for expertise, I just need to figure out what mine is now.

-A Support Group. Not a weekly AA meeting, the circle of people (and pets) you deem worthy enough to be graced by your presence. If this was me turning 20, my circle might have been bigger, or had several roles that were not defined. As you age, you narrow down the sphere to only include “true friends,” which are those that reciprocate an effort back to you. There is a wider circle of acquaintances, which are nice, serve a mild purpose and can feel nice to have 600 Facebook friends, but the handful that you keep close are priceless. I have been absolutely blessed to have found what I feel is an irreplaceable collect of talent, and just like a sports team, the roster might get tweaked over the years, and some may have more defined roles, but keep your All Stars around as long as you can.

-Passion. Enjoy everything you can while you can, cause things change quickly. If you have the chance to meet friends out for a drink you haven’t seen in awhile but are kind of tired, suck it up and join them for a few. If you keep planning to get to the gym, but find an excuse, again, suck it up, set some short term goals and get at it. If you want to learn about wine, put in the effort, want to be adventurous, go sky diving from as high as you can. It is easy to be distracted, but when you realize things change quickly, and experiences can be missed and regretted, if you gave everything you do your all, you can live the way I do, never regretting anything, there is always a lesson to be learned.

-A Sense of Humility. You may be the guy at the party with the hottest new sports car, the fattest bank account, or the biggest swinging dick in the place. But if you have to tell everyone about it, you are simply just a dick.

10/17/08

It's Been a Long Time...

Like Rakim said, but I think its time to speak my mind. With a plethora of topics to discuss, when not start on a Friday night on my computer. I'm not usually this big of a dork, but I have been more involved and invested in this upcoming election than I ever have in politics. I am enamored by the process of politics, especially with an eye on the marketing the candidates pull off. I have never spent so much time reading up on policy, evaluating debates, and being so critical, but I guess now is as much a pinnacle time this country requires such a vested interest by our youth. I did vote against the current manipulative leadership four years ago, and will do everything in my power to help other avoid that mistake again this time around. With less than three weeks to go, we all have a choice. I just hope is does not agree with Joe the Plumber.

7/11/08

iPhone 2.0

This is going to change everything. The new MLB.com at bat application will be the gold standard for sports fans craziness. Just wait until the NFL, or better, fantasy sports companies figure out how to personalize this idea and put it in the hands of millions of tech-savvy sports fans, possibilities are endless.

I have not explored all of the other apps yet, but I am excited, as the new Twitter and Facebook apps work much better than the saved URL alternative. I will follow up with a recap after I have had the weekend to play around, but kudos to Apple and MLB.

5/31/08

I'm At It Again

With an even bigger goal. Last year, I raised over $2,200 for cancer research, and I am going to do it again, however I have upped the goal to $3,200. Everyone has been touched by cancer, but consider donating whatever you can for a worthwhile cause. Whoever donates the most gets to cut my hair off once the goal is met. Check out the Charlie Riley fundraising page here for all of the info, it only take a few seconds. Thanks, and hope you like the blog!

5/30/08

Charlie bit my finger - again !

Between every other person naming their dog Charlie, Charlie the Tuna, hearing "Sorry Charlie" then a quick giggle, and now these two British internet sensations, Charlie might be world's most unflattering name going.

5/29/08

50 Things Every Grown Up Should Know

I cannot accept credit for writing these, but it's great info. Consider it Real Life 101. The test is every day.

1. Until you prove to yourself otherwise, always assume there is food stuck between your teeth.
2. A good rule of thumb: Your rent should not exceed one week's pay.
3. Women, think twice before you date anyone who regularly uses a number after his last name, as in Theodore W. Smithers III. And men, run for the hills the minute your date calls her father "daddy.''
4. Show up early and stay late for at least the first three months on the job. Once you've done that, future screw-ups on your part will be viewed as anomalies. (And unless you're very, very sick, don't call in sick, especially on Mondays and Fridays.)
5. Don't kid yourself. Opposites don't always attract.
6. Pay more attention to what the boss thinks of you than what your peers think of you. (Your cubicle mates aren't handing out promotions, raises and letters of recommendation, are they?)
7. Take lots of pictures along the way. But don't make everyone look at them.
8. Don't get married until you've spent at least a year living on your own. You need to know you can pay your own bills/ fill up your own time/ cultivate your own life before you let someone else do this stuff for you.
9. The harshest reality of life: Not everyone will like you.
10. At the restaurant, remember: solids on the left, liquids on the right. That means the water and wine will be placed to your right, bread to the left. When faced with a dizzying assortment of silverware, start with the utensils on the outside and work your way in.
11. Be nice to people "below'' you. They might be your boss someday. In fact, be nice to everyone -- waiters, cashiers, bank tellers, the mail carrier, the dog groomer, receptionists. And not just because it's the right thing to do. These people can make your life easier. If they want to.
12. Always, always, always RSVP.
13. During a job interview, never ask about vacation, money or what time people get to leave each day. Wait until an offer has been made, and even then, phrase that departure question very, very carefully.
14. Fresh garlic sautéed in good olive oil makes a fine pasta topping. Buy angel hair pasta, grate some fresh Parmesan and sprinkle on some basil. Quick, and it's better than ramen noodles or a bowl of Cheerios.
15. Don't comment on vintages and bouquets if you don't know what you're talking about. You'll look foolish. But do study wine tasting, photography, oil painting, pottery, playing the drums. Classes keep you interesting. (If you have to look like you know wine, don't sniff the cork. You'll look like an amateur. Instead, roll it between your fingers to check for signs of dryness. The cork should be evenly moist.)
16. If someone tells a joke you've already heard, it's best to just laugh.
17. Quickest way to a promotion, Part 1: Make it easy for your boss to ask you to do things. No eye rolling, no sighs, no big pouty lips.
18. If your job involves opening mail and answering phones, do it well. And cheerfully. A four-year degree (or a two-year degree or a six-year degree) does not mean you are above any task you were hired to do.
19. Never send a nasty e-mail. You'll spend a lot less time wringing your hands over who might have received your misfired missive. And eventually everyone misfires a missive.
20. Energy and enthusiasm on the job will carry you further than education and cocky self-assurance. Skills, especially at the entry level, can be taught; a great attitude cannot.
21. If you're a vegetarian, order a vegetarian meal. And then shut up about it.
22. Cellphones are useful, but they're distracting in many offices and workplaces. Either turn it off or answer it very, very quickly -- and then step outside if you have to scream to be heard. (And we know you already know to turn it off in restaurants, movie theaters and other obvious places. Right? Right!?)
23. Walk quickly at the office. It makes you look busier.
24. Think long and hard before burning a bridge.
25. Share the credit. Always. Don't worry, everyone already knows who pulls most of the weight. In the same vein, don't be afraid to fall on the sword. Admit mistakes often and loudly.
26. It's better to say, "I don't know," than to fake it. Sometimes, however, "I don't know" doesn't fly. In those situations, try, "Don't get me started, I'll go on forever." Few people will press the issue, because no one likes to listen to anyone blather on and on.
27. Bad neighbors should be exiled. Please don't be one. Keep your music low, be quiet at night, light fireworks only on the Fourth of July, clean up after your dog, keep your friends in line -- you know how to act. (And if you're one of those guys who's driving around with bass so low that your neighbor's plates rattle, here's the lowdown: We're sorry you need attention, but please don't look for it from us.)
28. Quickest way to a promotion, Part 2: Go above and beyond. So few people do that you will quickly stand out.
29. When traveling, avoid fast-food restaurants and chains. Find the local haunts and sample the local specialties. However, know when to apply the "Third World'' rule of thumb: Make sure your food is cooked and hot.
30. You've stayed at the party too long when 1) someone starts crying, 2) someone gets beaten up or 3) something major gets broken.
31. People love to talk about themselves. If you want to make a good impression, ask good questions. And then listen.
32. Your car is the most expensive item you'll own for a long time. It needs more than just gas.
33. Never under-dress for a job interview. You really are being judged on your appearance. If you've bothered to dress decently, you look like you've taken the interview, the job, yourself, their time, etc., seriously.
34. Take advantage of the 401(k) as early as possible. It's the closest thing to free money, even in these troubled times, that you'll ever find.
35. Learn the rules first, and then learn when to break them.
36. The things you regret later are almost always the things you didn't do. So go ahead and move to New Zealand.
37. Eventually you must stop blaming your parents for all of your problems.
38. Perfect the firm handshake. (For some reason, everyone knows this is important, but not everyone does it.) Look people in the eye. And speak clearly. While we're at it, exorcise "like, you know" from your vocabulary.
39. Leather doesn't stretch that much. Never buy uncomfortable shoes.
40. Well-meaning parents, teachers and coaches might have cared about your self-esteem, but those days are over. Be prepared to earn respect.
41. As soon as you start getting bills, buy a file cabinet or an accordion file and start organizing them.
42. Defer gratification. You can buy DVDs/ shoes/ many sushi dinners now, or take a really good trip/ replace your car/ buy a house later.
43. Plan to pay off your credit card balance every single month.
44. Don't buy a dog/ cat/ ferret if you're never home. It's mean. If you do commit to a pet, it's forever. Take it seriously.
45. Been dating the same person for two, five, seven years, and still not sure it's going anywhere? But it's just so comfortable and easy and, well, there's no one better waiting in the wings anyway? Break up.
46. Do you really want to live your life making only safe decisions? Take risks. No one takes anything you do that seriously until you're at least 30.
47. Money doesn't make someone smarter, more refined, funnier, decent, etc. Money equals freedom and nothing more. But that's why it's a good idea to save some.
48. Things that make a big -- and good -- impression: remembering birthdays and names and remembering to send thank-you notes. (Especially thank-you notes.)
49. Use your youth and good looks for all they're worth. Believe it or not, you won't be 22 forever.
50. Develop your brain/ heart/ soul/ personality. Believe it or not, you won't be 25 forever.

5/28/08

Soccer tonight

Gorgeous night for a soccer game, its about time we had sun, and I'm inspired by that sick Nike video.

Sent from my iPhone

One of the Coolest Videos Ever

2/29/08

Test

Seeing if this works

Sent from my iPhone

2/23/08

College Sports Make Me Sick

Well at least were not alone now.
Two college basketball programs, on opposite sides of the financial and prestige spectrum, are now joined at the hip. Except one had a golden ticket to buy its way out of a mess.

With the announcement of Kelvin Sampson's "resignation," Indiana faces a public mess similar to the scandal five years ago that rocked Saint Bonaventure their basketball team is still reeling from. Some of Indiana's players, including a Big 10 Player of the Year nominee, have said they will boycott the next game due to the coach's dismissal.

How loyal of these players, standing up for their coach being pushed out the door, except there is one problem. Sampson cheated by illegally calling recruits, not once but twice, got caught, and now walks away with $750,000, a half a million of which came from an anonymous alum.

I cannot seem to grasp who is more asinine in this higher education conundrum: This beyond wealthy alum funding an admitted cheater; the University for hiring this lowlife who, after cheating at Oklahoma deserted, leaving them with NCAA sanctions; the NCAA itself, punishing schools but not the scumbag coaches personally; Sampson, now onto tarnishing his second straight school; or these players sticking up for him.

I go back to the issue at St. Bonaventure because, let me disclaim, that I am a passionate alum, who hates to revert back to those sad times. But because we are in the Atlantic 10, a non-BCS Conference lacking in resources both on the court and off (i.e. alums with the disposable income to brush this under the rug), we were labeled everything negative under the sun by the mass media. If all of the facts came out that because of the questionable decisions by a deceptive coach, our players felt betrayed, thus electing to skip the remainder of the season since they were ineligible for postseason play, people might have understood. While I never agree sittng out the final games should have happened, remember, we are talking about 18-21 year-olds, in a circumstance we cannot understand. The problem was the adults involved were not properly helping the kids out, which is supposed to be what the core of college athletics is all about. I can understand why these Indiana players stand behind their coach, they don't know better.

But the fact of the matter remains that a coach with such power, who once broke the rules did it again, not two years later compounded it by lying. His punishment of a settlement for $750,000 makes me sick, losing what little shred of faith I had left in the purity of college sports.

With the millions raked in each year from television contracts, bowl game revenue and merchandise sales, the NCAA can try to smoke screen us by referring to all players as "student-athletes" in interviews and explaining in their free ads that those other 360,000 "student-athletes" are going pro in something other than sports, but its just a man behind the curtain taking us all to the bank. These players are all exploited, especially those at a top rate basketball school like Indiana. Except at tradition-rich Indiana, they can reload quickly, currently enjoying a top-10 program, where the Bonnies have yet to field a winning season since Jan Van Breda Kolff walked away from allowing a player with a welding certificate to suit up.

I think I am becoming numb, or turned off from professional sports, so maybe this is the last straw now that it hits the college level. Between Roger Clemens, Andy Pettitte, Floyd Landis, Marion Jones and countless others we'll never confirm, there is something inherently wrong with sports, teaching our kids the only way to get by is to cheat. It's ok the NCAA says, just leave your mess at your old school for them to clean up. All you have to do, according to the Sampson scouting report, is pick up the phone, make over 100 illegal phone calls, convince your players you are the martyr, and walk away with close to one million dollars.

I have always been a passionate college basketball fan, especially during March Madness. But if you will excuse me, I think this year I am going to call in sick.

12/26/07

A Special Night With Ronan Tynan

An interview I did with famed Irish Tenor Ronan Tynan in Buffalo Rising on December 26, 2007

10/22/07

Lanier Does Himself Proud

This was posted in The Buffalo News Sports Section October 22, 2007

Over the past few years, Saint Bonaventure University, my proud alma mater, has been dragged through muddy headlines locally and nationally over and over again. Even though the campus resides 90 minutes outside the epicenter of Buffalo, this small Franciscan utopia has delivered some of the best local athletic moments over the last few decades.

While I was too young to ever see him play, I was treated to a wonderful evening as a guest to witness the recognition for a man that tends to overshadow the school itself he attended. This past Friday night, the Reilly Center court, which what seemed like ages ago was labeled by ESPN the fifth hardest place to play in America, was named after the biggest name who patrolled its paint way back, Bob Lanier.

While some of today’s athletes demand monster contracts and could care less about fans, this man epitomizes everything Bonaventure tries to teach. Bob could have spent the entire time patting himself on the back, rehashing accolades and demanding the royal treatment. However the fans in attendance were the ones treated royally.

Lanier signed autographs for an hour prior to, and at least two hours after he gave a rousing speech about the values of education, having passion and giving back to others. A completely selfless man, who just so happens to travel the globe as the NBA’s Community Ambassador teaching youth right from wrong, “humbly accepted” this honor without first mentioning his former teammates, coaches, fans, the University president and major donors who made this new court happen.

I was never prouder as a Bonnie to hear the first person anyone mentions after you tell them you attended St. Bonaventure praise the fans and tout the same values I was blessed to receive, with an ear-to-ear smile on his face the entire time.

Over the years, Lanier’s relationship with the university was lukewarm, but I have to credit the current administration and leadership for reconnecting and bringing back into the family someone who was not just a great basketball player, but turns out to be one amazing gentleman and a true Bonnie at heart.

Thinks are looking up at the University and for their men’s basketball team led by new coach, Mark Schmidt. The steps are slow, but we have a new leader, and one of the best ever to represent us every day with his name on that floor. Thanks for coming back Bob, we missed you.

Charlie Riley ’01, ‘03

10/9/07

Just Stop Buffalo

This was posted last October:

Stop thinking we are only "Buffalo" wings and blizzards. 
Stop charging me to drive through Grand Island. 
Stop keeping the Main Place Mall an eyesore. 
Stop Downtown being a 9 to 5 city. 
Stop replaying Brett Hull's skate in the crease. 
Stop the Music City Miracle. 
Stop the Bass Pro talk. 
Stop making us use that deathtrap known as the skyway. 
Stop opposing progress. 
Stop bringing in the Gorski's, Giambra's and Larry Quinn's of the world. 
Stop giving a Major League Baseball expansion team to a Florida city that doesn't care. 
Stop just talking about the Peace Bridge. 
Stop making me move for a job. 
Stop educating everyone, then letting them slip away. 
Stop the Lackawanna Six. 
Stop polarizing Bucky Phillips. 
Stop leaving the waterfront the way it is. 
Stop having the Canadian side be 10 times nicer. 
Stop breaking our hearts letting Briere and Drury slip away. 
Stop losing 4 in a row. 
Stop the Adelphia scandal.  
Stop all of the unionized "projects" that cost too much. 
Stop useless construction. 
Stop only reporting when we get 2 feet of snow. 
Stop with the Casinos already.
 Stop linking us with OJ. Stop our "subway" from only going in one straight line. 
Stop having Main Street be a ghost town. 
Stop just talking about the good old days. 
Stop the beaucratic roadblocks that stunt our growth.  
Stop only funding NY State east of Albany. 
Stop the embarrassing view driving along the 33 near Buff State. 
Stop the last second field goals. 
Stop giving us a gorgeous 85-degree day, only to humiliate us on national TV. 
Stop giving us hope, then ripping it away. 
Stop being a national punch line.  

Just stop Buffalo. I can't take it anymore.

6/29/07

"It's a Jeep Thing..."

I drive a jeep, and apparently the "It's a Jeep Thing, You Just Wouldn't Understand" goes deeper than that. The most impractical vehicles on the road have a secret society, a la the Skulls. I have yet to reap the benefits of joining this elite culture, with the exception of grabbing about 10 miles a gallon, but I do get the "Jeep Wave" every time I drive by a fellow "cowboy/feminist/surfer/army vet."

When inquiring to my roommate, who owns a Corvette and has a similar affiliation with his vehicle and the perfect strangers who own them wave to him, he explained why. Because we lack no noticeable common interest except for our mode of transportation purchasing habits, there is a sign of solidarity shown by a quazi "whats up" wave while passing.

At first confused, and embarrassed, I now flash back a solid "foreign relations" a la Top Gun middle finger, which apparently shocks these rebels more than learning Paris Hilton has the Clap. The look on their face is priceless, and while its fun to drive with the top down during the summer, I can't wait till my lease is up.

I guess I still don't understand either.

5/5/07

Maybe Just Maybe

hope v. intr.- a belief in a positive outcome related to events and circumstances in one's life. Hope implies a certain amount of perseverance — i.e., believing that a positive outcome is possible even when there is some evidence to the contrary.

That definition signifies the attitude of an entire city lately, a collection of often-battered fighters who may just be turning the corner and turning Buffalo around. This definition also rings a little truer today after that metaphor for the Queen City called last night’s Sabres victory.

Every emotion was conveyed in the final few minutes, not just for a team, but for a region. It is often unfair when mainstream media, along with the general public, engage athletics as more than they are. In the end, the games are arbitrary to what matters most in life. However, these Buffalo Sabres, a scrappy ego-less team in an overlooked league are perfect representation for the scrappy, ego-less citizens of this overlooked gem called Buffalo, NY.

Being down with 15 seconds left and what looked like only a prayer to extend this dream season, you could look around HSBC Arena and see the deflated face of an entire region, from grandmother to business mogul to our youth, all emoting that look of “here we go again.” Buffalo has been knocked countless times for the weather, loss of jobs, development, you name it. Up until now, it is a model of how NOT to build a city.

But Chris Drury never quit, and when he somehow found the back of the net with 7.7 seconds left, you saw that look like we just might have turned the corner. Yes, the building erupted, as I assume bars and living rooms all over the area did the same. It was a great goal, but much more grandiose than that.

It showed that spark that Buffalo is not going down this time. You can see the progression everywhere. It is brewing, albeit at a slow rate, but things are happening and people are believing that Buffalo is doing something, anything, to be a once again proud city of change. Development is starting to occur, money is coming into the area and job growth has been steady. We are not over the hump by any means, but it’s a start.

Which brings me back to the Sabres. We have latched onto a group of unassuming, never-quit young men who represent so much of us, that we have adopted and followed to epic proportions this past season. With so much hype and talent, our expectations are the absolute peak, the first championship for a city that probably deserves it more than any other. Seeing the city rally around anything and dumping all of our emotions into, that thought of losing it all was right there on the doorstep last night. It would have been easy to throw in the towel, since we are used to being kicked while we’re down. But not this time. Emoting that perseverance, when the contrary says its not your time, went away with the help of Drury’s stick.

Now it is time to turn that hope into a tangible reality. Regardless if Lord Stanley’s chalice finds its way down Delaware Avenue on parade or we fall short, the season will fade away. But Buffalo will still be here, and what looks like on its way to being stronger than ever. To come full circle and quote the Goo Goo Dolls, whose Sabres playoff rally cry “Better Days” plays to open each game, “Cause tonight’s the night the world begins again.” That sentiment might be a little much, but I sure hope it is a start.

2/1/07

Quality Not Quantity

This was printed in the Buffalo News, February, 2007, which ultimately got me to stay in Buffalo.

Leave Your Mark

So I got my wig split today; haircut, for the lay-person. As part of the routine, I had the longest hair of my life shampoo'ed prior to meeting the scissors. As I rested my head, speaking to the two-month-old hair washer/stylist, I found out that she had just finished beauty school, was "trying to build her cleintele" and subsiquently scrubbing a ton of locks in the process.

This revelation made me think about assistant basketball coaches, junior financial advisors, the bassist in a band, and every bussboy/waiter/server in any restaurant across the world. They all had the same idea, regardless of the industry.

I could do it better myself.

That though has crossed the mind of every associate producer of TV commercials and movies, every account exec. at an advertising agency, every clothing designer. They could get the better shot, write a better tagline, or stitch the hottest fashion.

Same as that bartender with the idea for the "it" new lounge or the coach with a better box set to attack a 1-3-1 defense.

The premise is simple, the execution much grander. we all have exquisite dreams of being or own boss, executing our own plans and bringing a little of ourself to this world. It takes mas cahones and a leap of faith to stretch our boundaries and do our own thing, but maybe not as much as we think. We can apply a little of each of us to all that we do. There is no need to remain stagnant, albiet wearing bold stripes to work (haha), or whatever it is you do to stand out. It doesn't have to be newsworthy, or turn into a Fortune 500 company, but always LEAVE. YOUR. MARK.

If you have an idea and are passionate about it, take a risk. If you want a raise, tell your boss you deserve it, or that your competitor says you deserve it. Fly to Chicago on a whim without an interview, things like this make you realize have options, and a pulse.

Pain equals growth, and pain can mean anything; constantly being in the background playing bass in your band, washing mounds of dishes, being a glorified secretary for your accounts, etc. But, eventually you will take all of the experience you accumulated and set yourself free, or use the interpretation in your everyday role, and there is nobility in either decision.

Because you cannot build your clientele without washing a ton of hair first. Hypothetically speaking.

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